It’s Enough (Dayeinu)

This is not my typical blog post.

We hosted our family’s annual Passover Seder this past Saturday night. During the course of the Seder, we drink four cups of wine as part of celebrating our freedom and deliverance from slavery.

Actually, we drink “nearly” four cups because, just prior to the second cup, we traditionally remove 10 drops of wine to remember the suffering caused by the 10 Plagues. Even though we are commemorating our freedom, we diminish our joy by removing wine from what is a cup of celebration.

In recent years many families (including mine) remove an additional drops to be mindful of modern plagues – among them poverty, hunger, war, inequality, pollution of the earth, and others.

But what to do this year, our second Seder of the pandemic? Here we are living through a modern day plague that has cost more than half a million lives in the US, disrupted our economy, and divided us in ways many thought weren’t possible.

How do we begin to heal and find joy again, not just as individuals, but as families, communities, nations, and a world?

With that in mind, here is a piece that I wrote for our Seder.

As we celebrate our freedom tonight, we have nevertheless tempered our joy by remembering the Ten Plagues that God sent upon the Egyptians. We are also mindful of the modern-day plagues of hunger, bigotry, injustice, indifference to the care of the Earth, and others that also diminish our joy.

But what about the plague we currently face? Here we are, one year later, some still suffering, still separate, still separated. How many ways has the pandemic saddened us and kept us joyless?

Join me in removing more drops from our wine glasses.

     In our homes, where we should feel safest of all, we instead felt stuck and confined in a narrow place, just like the Hebrew slaves in Egypt.

     We were angered by actions of others that were reckless, harmful, and selfish. How did wearing a mask become a political statement? 

     We were outraged by the lack of response and responsibility of our leaders.

     We were shocked at the rise of bigotry and prejudice. Or maybe we weren’t.

     We wept over the attack by fringe groups on our democracy and political institutions.

     We experienced and grieved losses, oftentimes alone and apart from family and friends.

We lost togetherness, affection, and family embraces, plus the ability to celebrate birthdays, graduations, proms, weddings, and anniversaries; to take vacations; to attend funerals; to maintain our feelings of security; and to continue our education or employment.

     We marked time by what we lacked and chose not to do – celebrating holidays together, going out to eat, and making plans.

     We worried – oh, did we worry! From running out of toilet paper and cleaners, to running out of money, to catching the virus.

Our world continued to shrink and shrink. It would not have been surprising if we disappeared entirely and cut ourselves off from each other. How can there be any wine still left in our glasses?

But look. There is! Even if it’s only a drop, there is!

And this is where I say DAYEINU! ENOUGH! I will not remain in this narrow place. I will not hold onto to these feelings of powerlessness, anger, and righteous indignation any longer! While my cup may not runneth over, I can easily see that there is some joy from which I can drink.

     We coped – better at some times than others. We got through our days, which became weeks, that turned into months and has become a year. And here we are now, celebrating together.

     We cared for and supported each other – shopping for groceries, encouraging each other during tough times, helping others schedule and receive vaccines, holding drive-by and drive-through celebrations, daily and weekly family Zoom calls. Reconnecting with friends we hadn’t seen in so long. Adding insight, perspective, and advice to help break through constraints.

     We took advantage of opportunities that arose precisely because we were in a pandemic. New jobs and careers, new places to live, new experiences, new relationships, new pets, the chance to CHOOSE to pause, breathe, and reflect on what is truly important and to separate the signal from the noise.

     We recognized that we are truly interconnected – that I do better when you do better, and vice versa. And the world does better when we do better. It’s not about putting others before me or myself before others. It’s finding the ways how we, as a society, move forward together.

Our awareness and sensibilities have shifted tremendously, and the last year has created a lot of space for us.

Just look at your wine glass. What will you do – today, right now, at this moment – to refill your cup?